Relationship Compatibility in Couples Dr Molly Barrow author of Matchlines Self Help

A relationship will have limitless conflict and change over the span of a lifetime. Respect is an important issue when we look at differences. Just as one partner may have an ability to smell the faintest scent, your partner may have sensitive ears that cannot tolerate certain forms of music or may have compromised hearing that requires increased volume. Believe your partner when they say they cannot stand a form of music and show them that you respect their opinion even if you disagree. The mistake that couples often make is to assume that when a new partner’s tastes and lifestyle are the same as their own then this reflects a superior relationship. What makes a superior relationship is not that you start out with few conflicts, but more importantly is how you handle the conflicts that you encounter. The tools that you use to handle conflict are what will make a relationship thrive or fail. As a couple learns to adjust to unique differences, their relationship can strengthen and becomes more comfortable. Initially we emphasize our similarities during the courtship phase but after a few months, we begin to chafe at the many differences. Creative compromises and making room in your life with tolerance and even curiosity about the unfamiliar are assets that can hold your new relationship together. Ultimately, even married people walk very separate paths while together. That may include a heavy metal concert that requires a set of earplugs for one partner or perhaps, a small book to keep you awake at the Philharmonic. What is important is that you share as much as you can with your partner and let it be all right that you share some events with just your best friend.


Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author ofthe new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking atRelationships and Making the Right Choices in Love.” She is a leadingforensic expert, authority on relationship issues and a licensed mental health counselor. A member of the American Psychological Association, Dr. Molly has appeared on NBC, PBS, KTLA, GO-CO feature film My Suicide, WGUF-FM, the documentary "Ready to Explode," and interviews for Psychology Today, Newsday, O Magazine, MSN.com, Hitched and The Nest. For more information, please visit:www.askdrmolly.com