Dr. Molly Barrow

The Official Dr. Molly Barrow Blog offers educational self help advice about relationships, business, dating, marriage, parenting, teenagers and children, self-esteem, love and romance. Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D in psychology and is the author of Matchlines for Singles and the self-esteem adventure series, Malia and Teacup Awesome African Adventure and Malia and Teacup Out on a Limb. Dr. Molly is a relationship and psychology expert host on progressiveradionnetwork.com and television guest.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Grief and Broken Hearts-Even in Hollywood! Relationship expert Dr. Molly Barrow

When a mis-Matched spouse decides to leave the marriage, their decision is often a calculated and well thought out plan, rather than a sudden impulse resulting from one event. The spouse who remains in love is rendered powerless by their own dependence and may become desperate to save the marriage at any cost. Thwarted desperation may turn to rage. As the marriage begins to fall apart, sometimes the one that is still in love also begins to fall apart. Heartsick and angry that they have been abandoned, the pain that engulfs them can be overwhelming. Often these individuals turn to medications, alcohol or illegal drugs to help dull the ache for their departing loved one. If this person is a parent, as in the case of a young Hollywood starlet, to add injury to their heartbreak, their behavior looks unacceptable in the eyes of the court and to all other good parents. Meanwhile, the one, who was partying prior to the separation and eventually escaped, begins to look devoted in comparison to their abandoned spouse.
Anyone making an evaluation must rewind to the parenting before the heartbreak. Who did the parenting before the marriage became intolerable? Was this starlet a good mother before her heart was broken and before she was humiliated in front of the world? Although she is often told to seek treatment for alcohol and substance abuse, what she may need is treatment for her broken heart. The stakes are high because now she risks losing her children to him as well. Alcohol and substances are ugly monsters on anyone but especially a very young mother crying out for help, even though she is alienating fans, family and friends in a downward spiral.

Time will mend her broken heart and she just may look back on these days and wonder what she ever saw in him. Usually after a divorce, grief lasts a year or two. Once a person recovers from an extreme heartbreak, they rarely ever go to that place again.

The Match Lines Relationship Compatibility Test will soon be available for everyone to take. I know that it will help struggling couples mend their relationships. Singles will learn to look for qualities in a spouse that will help make their relationships more successful. To save anyone from the heartbreak of divorce will be a tremendous blessing.


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