Dr. Molly Barrow

The Official Dr. Molly Barrow Blog offers educational self help advice about relationships, business, dating, marriage, parenting, teenagers and children, self-esteem, love and romance. Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D in psychology and is the author of Matchlines for Singles and the self-esteem adventure series, Malia and Teacup Awesome African Adventure and Malia and Teacup Out on a Limb. Dr. Molly is a relationship and psychology expert host on progressiveradionnetwork.com and television guest.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Is the Ex Coming to Visit Your Child?

Is your Ex coming to visit your child? The most important consideration is not you and your stirred up anxiety. Your child needs a relationship with their parent more than you need to resolve old feelings from the past. As long as you trust the parent to keep the child fed and safe from danger or abuse, be quiet and let their relationship be what it can be. Relax, think of your Ex more as a babysitter than a threat. Take the free time and treat yourself to good parenting rewards, like walks along the shore, a new shirt, a pedicure, a glass of wine or wheat grass with a friend. No matter how wonderful a parent you are, you are only capable of fulfilling fifty percent of your child's parenting needs. They need to know they are worthy and having a visit from an absent parent can mend a big hole in your child's heart. Let it be and wish your child the love of that parent. Your Ex may have abandoned and hurt the family and you may feel they do not deserve your child's love. However, your child deserves to feel loved by his or her parents as much as possible. Never say an unkind word about your child's parent. Kids see the truth, usually around twelve years old, anyway. Pray for that parent to finally get it before it is too late, to realize that a child's love is precious and valuable, never to be taken for granted or squandered. Miracles happen. Sometimes people do get wiser with maturity and time, even Exes.

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